Ignore the chinese characters.

Caller #1: Knock Knock.

Richard: Eh…. Who’s there?

Caller #1: Who

Richard: Who who?

Caller #1: Knock Knock.

Richard: Who’s there!?

Caller #1: Who.

Richard: Who who!?

Caller #1: Knock knock

Richard: Who’s the bloody fuck is there!?

Caller #1: Who.

Richard: WHO WHO!?

Caller #1: Can you please stop talking like an owl. Muahahahaha.

---------------------------
*Alex is a priest. trying to convince ppl to join the religion* PLEASE DO NOT BE OFFENDED.. if you are.. sorry.

Alex: Hi, how are you?
Cheeky: Not good, groin area damn itchy.
Alex: Eh… ok, my name is Alex, what’s yours?
Cheeky: Cheeky.
Alex: Nice name. Do you have a religion?
Cheeky: I’m a free thinker. Please do not discriminate against me.
Alex: Of course not. *suddenly leaning very closely* I say, are you available by any chance?

*Cheeky instinctively placed his hands behind his backside*

Cheeky: I’m not gay. You fucking perv.
Alex: Haha, sorry. What I mean is, are you available for a chat?

*Cheeky’s hands still clutched tightly to his butt.*

Cheeky: What for?
Alex: To let you know more about God.
Cheeky: Which one? Tua Pei Gong or Tee Gong
Alex: Hah?
Cheeky: Hah what? My mom told me that these 2 are very powerful gods and can kick a lot of ass ok.
Alex: Haha. No, no. The God I’m going to talk to you about is the one mention in the bible
Cheeky: Oh, I see. Well, it depends on your sincerity.
Alex: Eh… can you define it for me?
Cheeky: I’m quite hungry. If you are really sincere, maybe you can buy me dinner and then we can talk it over the meal.

*Alex’s face contorted slightly as if he kena stroke.*

Alex: Eh… ok.

Cheeky brought Alex to Crystal Jade to sample all the mouth-watering cuisines.

Alex: Eh… I thought we are going to a hawker center or fast food restaurants.
Cheeky: *chuckle* Oh Alex Alex, I didn’t know your sincerity is so cheap. *chuckle some more* Aiyah, never mind lah. Anyway nice meeting you. *pretend to leave*
Alex: No no wait wait. I’m just joking. Hahaha.

With that, we proceed into the restaurant, ordered and began tucking into some expensive and delightful Cantonese dishes. In between mouthfuls of shark fins and abalones, cheeky have in depth discussion with Alex on God and the teaching of the bible. However, Alex seemed to be pre-occupied with something else.

Cheeky: Alex, are you okay?
Alex: Oh, yah yah, I’m fine. So are we done?
Cheeky: You know, there’s this passage in the bible that I’m quite confuse about. Why not we discuss it further over desserts. There’s this durian pudding that this restaurant is famous for, so I was thinking of ordering a few bowls and maybe tapao an additional dozen for my family. You don’t mind hor.
Alex: ……….
Cheeky: Yo Alex, you there?
Alex: Yah yah. Feel free to order anything.
Cheeky: Thanks Alex. You are the best preacher ever.
Alex: You are welcome. Don’t mind me, but I’ll like to visit the restroom first.
Cheeky: Sure, go ahead.

Cheeky don’t know what happened to Alex, but that was the last time he ever saw him. Cheeky was feeling pretty indignant about being left waiting in the restaurant like a fool and having to pay for the meals. Oh Alex, why did you do such a thing? Cheeky was almost near to being converted by you, if only you have bought the durian puddings and help to foot the bill. You cut me deep Alex, real deep. So deep in the pockets that Cheeky has to munch on bread/biscuits and plain water for the next few weeks. Please everyone, if you ever see an ang moh wearing white short sleeve shirt, black pants, a tie and carrying a black haversack walking around Toa Payoh central, feel free to give him a kick in the ass. Cheeky would feel most appreciated. And by the way Alex, if you happen to be reading this, cheeky still has the receipt from the restaurant with him.